Many are finding it difficult to adjust to the ‘new normal’ that COVID has brought with it. Wearing masks in shops, cafes, bars, etc., is not something anyone saw coming, at least not before March 2020. Some people feel that they already played their part in the spring and early summer of 2020, and it’s upsetting as they see their freedoms being reduced once more. For those living in Tier 3 lockdown measures, maybe it feels like a backwards step. People are missing their families and friends; it’s not as simple as arranging a catch up or planning a big meal out anymore – life and ways of doing things have changed for everyone. There could be a sense that there is too much time now, where once you had a busy schedule. Perhaps work has slowed right down, due to closing upon government advice, or because of having too-few customers.
The weather is changing, and the nights are drawing in. Though I’ve seen many posts about pumpkin-spiced lattes and cosy nights-in, the darker nights can be really challenging for some. The lack of daylight, cold weather, plus less time spent out and about can contribute to lower mood, or feelings of unease.
The NHS advises some steps to wellbeing:
- Connect with others
- Be physically active
- Learn new skills
- Give to others
- Pay attention to the present moment
Though these steps could sound simple– consider how COVID, plus the autumn/the nights drawing in, might impact our ability to engage in activities which make us feel good.
People in Tier 3 lockdown conditions are unable to connect with friends and family in the same way, unable to plan things with others for the foreseeable future. For Liverpool, gyms are shut, and in other areas the prospect remains a possibility. This makes being physically active much more of a challenge. For some people, it doesn’t feel safe to run outdoors afterwork, especially with it going dark earlier, meaning staying active is harder with gyms closed. Learning new skills might be affected. Non-essential travel on public transport is advised against in some areas, meaning it might be hard to travel to learn something new, attend sports coaching or music lessons. Giving to others might also be more difficult now due to people’s increased financial instability. Paying attention to the present moment might well be helpful – but it’s worth remembering that it can be hard to be mindful, quiet and peaceful when we are stressed. You might be feeling anxious from not getting out much, or from remembering to bring and wear a mask. Or feeling generally worried about what will come next at work, or what you will hear on the news!
For many, the first full lockdown of this year was a shock to the system. It provided many with job insecurity or fears for their health. There was more time to think through things we might previously have taken for granted; our relationships, jobs, where we live. For those who were Key Workers, there were often times of intense stress and worry. Many students this year left school without a long-awaited prom, or left university without experiencing a graduation ceremony to acknowledge their efforts.
This year has been a time of loss, stress, and uncertainty for many. Whatever life experiences you may have had, I bet that at some points since March, things have felt intense and difficult. A global pandemic, coupled with lots of time away from loved ones gave us plenty of time for worry and rumination. I am sure I am not the only one who has looked to the news and social media for reassurance, not necessarily to find what I need. And though we’re advised to reach out for help during difficult times, it’s not always easy. Maybe the people we’d normally reach out to in times of crisis are experiencing their own difficulties. It might be hard to know where to go for support, and maybe there’s a fear of burdening others. For some of us, going to the gym was a haven; seeing our friends and/or family kept us afloat; going to work made coming home feel a relief. For some of us these things became unavailable, and this has felt like, or has been, a loss.
This blog wasn’t intended to be doom and gloom, or to highlight the negatives of the ‘new normal’. It was intended to remind you that though this is our new normal, it is not ‘normal’ – it’s new, unchartered territory. Nobody has experienced this before, and it is understandable to feel lost or ‘down’, now more than ever. It might be helpful to remind yourself that you are doing your best, even if your best doesn’t feel good enough at times.
I saw a meme I liked recently; it said, if you can’t look on the bright side, I will sit with you in the dark. If anybody would like some extra support through these strange times, I am available for both online and face-to-face sessions. Another way to find therapists is on Google, or there are directories, such as Psychology Today
You can search for BACP registered and UKCP registered therpists in your area. I am a registered member of BACP and adhere to their Ethical Framework for counselling professionals.
Samaritans provides support 24 hours a day, 7 days a week – tel.: 116 123.
Reference
https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/improve-mental-wellbeing/
